The best thing ever!

GUYS!

I have something I wanna share with you. I know this is so sudden but it just happened not too long ago and i am overjoyed by this. It is the most awesome-mest thing that ever happened to me in such a long time.

So my second week passed by just like that, and before i know it, it was already the weekend where I am supposed to go to Ipoh for a worship conference in St.Peters Church! So me and my church members from St.Pauls Church PJ attended this 3 days 2 nights conference (including my younger sister, Celine) and had an awesome time there.

Anwyays, this post isn't really about the conference! It's about what happened after the conference that is related to the conference? Don't really get it? Get it! haha =D

So on the last night, the pastors were ministering to the young people and members who attended the conference. And I really wanted to go up and get prayed for. But I've always had this doubt that maybe the presence of God wasn't there and it was just the music that was making everything seem like God was there. There and then i asked God to show me a clear sign that His presence is there, and if the pastor said that His presence is there...why can't i feel His presence? I was very uncertain of many things. And God didn't answer my prayer. So i didn't go up to get prayed for...and I was disappointed.

But my heart was yearning so much to hear His voice again! So i spoke to a very close friend of mine about this, her name is Janning...and she knocked some sense into my head by asking me some questions...and suggested that i was too proud to admit that the presence of God was there. So i asked myself, "Who was I to challenge Him to show me a clear sign?" For the Bible said...

"Because you have seen me, you have believed. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed." (John 20.29)

But my question to God was..."If i need to see to believe, will i not be blessed at all?" I was praying on this the whole session and i didn't hear anything from God. But after what Janning told me, I decided to humble myself and went to look for a pastor to pray for me.

So i went up to Ps.Michael from St.Peters church, and He happens to be the father of my old friend, Timothy Lim. So after getting prayed over, i was still left with a lot of questions in my head. I got a clue...but i was still clueless.

So i left the conference this afternoon, still with a lot of ponders and doubts. When my church members left...i felt a pinch of loneliness in my heart. When I got back home to my apartment in Kampar...i felt EVEN more lonely as all of my housemates were out. So happen today none of them were in. I had a lil talk with my younger brother on MSN but suddenly he had to go because of dinner...i felt LAGI lonely.

It was really bad...the loneliness that filled my heart was torturing. I was hoping that I had a friend with me here. But usually I would never express such emotions as I am quite an egoistic person and I always have the mindset that I must train myself to hold back emotions in any event i need to be strong to support my loved ones. And then something weird happened. I suddenly remembered this song that I've known for almost 4 years...and it was playing in my head ever since this afternoon when i was still at the conference.

Awkwardly enough, the song suddenly came to mind again when i was in my room without me realizing and i was singing the chorus silently in my mind. I didn't remember the title but i remember it was sung by Delirious + Hillsongs...that particular version. And I loved the music so much...i didn't even bother to remember the lyrics. So as I was alone and had nothing better to do, hence...i switched on my laptop and search for the song in my archive as I remember I have downloaded it some time ago.

When I found the song, I played it. It's entitled "What A Friend I've Found" by Hillsongs + Delirious. And I don't know why this time...I just looked up the lyrics online...eventho I already know the song. And somehow, the quality of the song was SO GOOD it felt as if someone was right at my ear speaking to me. My volume was only 70%.

So as the song played...i was blown away by the lyrics in the verses. it meant so much to me and it was so beautifully written...that it completely compliments the chorus;

"Jesus, Jesus,"

"Jesus, you're my friend forever."

At the last part of the song...the singers kept repeating the words...."you're my friend forever..." over and over again until the song ended. And suddenly, I just began to feel such a heavy press on my chest...and I started sobbing. It was as if i've lost someone that kind of cry, in fact, i was weeping! but the thing is i wasn't feeling sad at all! Instead i felt so touched, free and overjoyed...that i couldn't help but cry like a baby.

Immediately, i knew the presence of God was surrounding me and I just broke down and repented before God with these simple words as i cried; "God...oh...God....I'm so sorry...". God was definitely there with me in my room...

I felt so touched by this because...I haven't been able to cry like this in the presence of God before. This is my first time. And also because I've havent been able to cry like this for 3 years. It is such an awesome feeling. And at the time when i felt so lonely...God spoke to me and told me that He is and will be my friend forever...

I just want to share this with you because I believe that there are so many other people and young people out there like me that might be having the same questions and doubts that i had last night in the conference. And i just want to let those who are going thru the same thing as I was know that, God will never forsake you and God is always with you as long as you believe. =)

All glory be to God. Amen! =D

Here's the song and also the lyrics! =)

I hope you will really enjoy this simple but yet extremely meaningful song and may God touch you through this.

"What A Friend I've Found" by Hillsongs + Delirious

what a friend i've found
He's closer than a brother
i have felt your touch
more intimate than lovers


Jesus, Jesus
Jesus, you're my friend forever  


what a hope i've found
more faithful than a mother 
It would break my heart to ever lose each other